Pages by Rod Hayward aka..
{SMEG}~Taz ^..^

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Although this is primarily a news page for the members, if you are n't a Smeg and you have wandered in here out of curiosity, you are welcome anyway.

  • The news will be updated as and when time permits, the last two weeks on the page will be transferred to the archive page.

  • Game tips, bugs and snags will be on the appropriate pages.

  • It will, of course, be dependent on time and space [no pun intended] :)

  • I do not intend to list the "best, worst, so and so sucks" type stuff.

  • Any reproduced posts are "as is" with no guarentees or acceptance of any liability for innaccuracies or errors.

Friday Jan 22nd
Did n't know she was a BZ fan, wonder if it was dual mags?

( From Yesterdays Daily Mail )

Thursday Jan 21st
This just in for all you shoe followers. Muhahahaha!
Sorry, I can't think of anything today! Oh Btw sorry to Jaki, Fear and Locke for disappearing last night. I lost the con and I could n't be arsed to reconnect. I'll try again tonight.

Wednesday Jan 20th
This from our prodigal Finn. It explains why he's been missing so long. Also poor old Tenk's in the crap, bummer.

"Happy new year

I havent been playing because i didnt have battlezone for a LONG time, actually i got it yesterday again, my cd rom is a bit broken, had to rip off my hard drive and install battlezone to it on my friends computer... (tenkas to be exact)..

Tenka wont be playing for a long time, hes machine is busted but good (hardware is alright, but the freaking win95 ...grrr)

Im getting ISDN pretty soon (spawney get) here so im definetely going to play bz. And I definetely want to play against other clans =) I mean the bzf thing."

So there you have it. I still have no news from VC, but SP, or some other lot said they would like a crack at us and will mail me when.

Fear and I took a trip to the Whipsnade 1 server last night. There are some absolute nutters there. As usual it ended up with the inevitable "We'll just Nuke the world" solution.

When I was a kid I was told that anyone could grow upto be President, now I believe it.

Tuesday Jan 19th
I just heard fron SAMPO at long last! Not much, but a least some contact. Anyway, Life's too short, so I told him get stuck in again. All that needed to be said has been said, so I ain't flogging a dead horse.

Moving on. I got a mail from Killie today asking about the VC challange. I have n't heard a sausage , I'm afraid. As soon as I do I'll post it.

Monday Jan 18th

Sorry to all the Chimpinator fans for the delay. PC is still in bits while i wear out the ISA slot constantly plugging and unplugging this bloody scsii card. My thanks to Up's for his patient support.

Sorry about that. We will be a year old in April, one of the longest surving gangs :). Wonder if any ones been around longer ? BMR perhaps? Some tart called me a Mag Whore last night, ha ha hah, praise indeed.

Here's a few

Seminars, n.:From "semi" and "arse", hence, any half-assed discussion.

Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere.

If you can lead it to water and force it to drink, it isn't a horse.

If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage, but this garbage, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and none dare criticize it.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Sunday Jan 17th
I had a mail from Col Failure yesterday, seems like the VC want a pop at now : ). Let me know who wants to get stuck in. Those of us who did not play last time will get first refusal. I know Alien and Gavner are keen.

I Have n't been about toady 'cos I have been to the parents to tell them they are going to be grandparents in August.

I.E. I am going to be a daddy :)

It's gonna be our first one, I hope I got the patience, heh. Well at least if it wakes me up at night I can get a quick game in, Ha ha ha ha.

Saturday Jan 15th
SMEG 2.... MOD 0



Fear and Loathing
Brum Brum



Well we won the rumble last night, no thanks to my crap preformance. We had two games with the MOD a Pyramind, followed by an Armageddon, each 20 mins long. During the first game I managed to ram a severly wounded Fear and kill him (he was impressed). Round one was a clear win with the boys taking the top 3 places. My thanks to Brum for stepping in at the last minute to make up a team. Upuaut fell asleep in front of the telly watching TFI Friday! Sad person :) If it was the IG, they would have taking him out and shot him. "Ve vill not tolorate zis neglect ov duty" ha ha ha.

The second round was really bizarre. On at least 4 occasions each Fear and I destroyed an enemy ship and just got "---- tank destoyed" with no credit, although the MOD were being debited losses. This was not so easy to score as the list from top to bottom was mixed. After adding the kills and subtracting the deaths we won by one kill. A close run thing.

Our thanks to OmniCron and the MOD boys for a good, chimp free (largely, eh Mink ? he he) game.

I'll get this of to the BZF as soon as can.

Follow the shoe!

Friday Jan 15th
Mod rumble is now going to be played tonight (probably). So far Fear, Up's and Myself is the likely combination. Alien has also expressed an interest in getting stuck in. I am waiting to hear from Omicron aabout timers and choice aof map etc. I think we ought to stick to 3 on 3 to avoid too much lag. Those of you who don't get a go this time will have first hit next time. Other than that impromptu punch-ups are still an option

Killie and I had a laugh with Omicron and Claymore on a Pyramid last night, "It's only a friendly" Omi kept shouting, LOL, zzzzzzzzt, poof, parp. Twin purple flashy thingies.

I'll keep you posted on developments.

Meanwhile, as its the weekend, here are some more sillies:

A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature replaces it with.-- Tenessee Williams ('specially for the VC boys :)

After [Benjamin] Franklin came a herd of Electrical Pioneers whose names have become part of our electrical terminology: Myron Volt, Mary Louise Amp, James Watt, Bob Transformer, etc. These pioneers conducted many important electrical experiments. For example, in 1780 Luigi Galvani discovered (this is the truth) that when he attached two different kinds of metal to the leg of a frog, an electrical current developed and the frog's leg kicked, even though it was no longer attached to the frog, which was dead anyway. Galvani's discovery led to enormous advances in the field of amphibian medicine. Today, skilled veterinary surgeons can take a frog that has been seriously injured or killed, implant pieces of metal in its muscles, and watch it hop back into the pond just like a normal frog, except for the fact that it sinks like a stone. -- Dave Barry, "What is Electricity?"

Alas, I am dying beyond my means.-- Oscar Wilde (as he sipped champagne on his deathbed).

"All flesh is grass" -- Isiah. So smoke a friend today :)

Do n't forget this is your clan too, if you have got any contributions send them to me!

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